On Open Letter Regarding ND SB 2252

An Open Letter to the Senators of North Dakota Regarding SB 2252:

Senators of North Dakota,

I am member of the United States Air Force. I am a community volunteer. I am citizen. And I am gay.

I am a gay North Dakotan, and how you vote on SB 2252 directly impacts me.
But I am not writing this to you for me. I'm not even writing this to you
for my LGBT friends, roommates, or coworkers. I am writing this to you, I am
pleading with you for the children of this great state. By passing this bill
and ensuring its success through ALL levels of the North Dakota Legislature
you have the opportunity, no the priviledge, to show every youth in this
state that they are wanted and that they belong and that they are not second
class citizens in this state. To proclaim to them that it gets better! That
is your charge and your responsibility. To send a strong and powerful
message to every kid, teen, youth, adult, and traveler that here in North
Dakota it does not matter what you look like, who you pray to, or who you
love you are wanted and respected and deserving of protection.

I urge you to vote in support of SB 2252 and let the LGBT youth of North
Dakota know there is hope.

-Jacob Thomas, SSgt, USAF
Grand Forks, ND

Why Are Gays the Sluts of the World?

Why are gays the sluts of the world? I ask this question not thinking we are but knowing that we are most definitely perceived that way. This stigma of homosexuals being sex crazed whores is in some cases over-exaggerated and in others just completely baseless. Still, I want to put forth what I think are causes, not excuses, and also offer up that it's not just us gays who get around the town.

Let's start off by noting that the human race as a whole is sex crazed (look at our tv ads) and that expressing the capacity to love in sexual ways is something ingrained into all of our cultures. So what then brings out this condemnation on us, the homos, specifically? Well, I'm glad I asked. I was recently talking with some friends about the marriage limiting amendment that is coming up for vote in Minnesota. The general response I get, even from other gays, is that we don't have long term relationships and that it is rare when one of our couple pairings makes it -- the exception not the norm. Where does this consensus come from? And furthermore, why are we being singled out on this? We have proven statistics that show more than half of marriages end in divorce. Guess what, the gays can't get married yet! So it isn't us!! So, we have over half of our heterosexual counterparts breaking up after making a 'lifetime' commitment to each other and yet us homos are the ones who can't make relationships work?! Who the fuck writes this shit? I have seen relationships, no matter who they are with, end and fade. The sexes of those involved has been a moot point.

Now, I will admit that I think our community has historically not been in the relationship business: more out of necessity than want. It is very difficult to have full fledged relationships when for the majority of our history we feared for our livelihoods, and worse our lives themselves, if we were discovered as lovers. So that fed into this hookup lifestyle: made ever so easy with the advent of bathhouses and gay bars at the turn of the twentieth century. There's a trend of this changing and shifting rather rapidly, and it's been an emerging trend for quite some time. We are relational beings after all (even us gays). We also have to remember that there haven't been services to help us through relationship problems. Until recently there was no major support structure to speak of for our community. However, I believe we are at the point where we are no more likely to break up than our heterosexual counterparts. And it's time people started recognizing that very important fact. I would also predict that when we eventually gain equal rights and the stigma surrounding gay relationships is fully discarded we will quickly see that our love and commitment is just as real and messy and rewarding as everyone else's in this world.

-Jacob, 6 Sep 2012

My Stance on Equality

My Stance on Equality

    I have often wished to have lived in another time of history. To have experienced the building of the Colossus, the splendor of the Pyramids, or the epic of the Hanging Gardens, the wonders of antiquity have always fascinated me and I have longed to have experienced them in their time and glory. However, it is becoming increasingly apparent to me that I was born for such a time as this, we were born for this. Our generation is at a pivotal moment in history. We, the digital generation, are at a point in time where decisions and actions and coming out stories don't just affect those close to you but can have overarching implications that span the globe. Since my coming out story was posted on YouTube and my Facebook, hundreds of people have seen it and responded by email or comments or made videos of their own. There are thousands of stories like this. Stories of others being helped and encouraged by another's action. Our generation has the privilege and opportunity to end bullying and hatred and fear by speaking out. We are caught in a battle that was started before us but can and should be finished by us. We can choose to stand for equality and justice, not just in America, but across this world. You see, these arguments and discussions are not something that is only America's problem. This isn't something that is localized to just us. This is a global issue - a human issue. For far too long people have hurt and killed themselves because of the rhetoric and hate of those over them, or worse yet been killed, murdered, and martyred by those same people and entities. I am so grateful and enthusiastically supportive of campaigns like the Trevor Project and It Gets Better for fighting teen suicide and bullying, but I wish for a world where they don't need to exist. We, as a mature, educated, and supposed wise society, should have no need to tell a child that was bullied for their sexual orientation that they are actually a worthy being, because they shouldn't be bullied in the first place! Acts of violence in any form and especially against someone for how they love has no place in a 'civilized' school system and society. I'm comforted that schools are coming around to help protect those individuals who are being harassed, but we must do more. We fight for equality because that is the only way to stop the bullying, to stop the hatred. Until there is full equality the philosophy of hate and discrimination will continue. Until there is full equality children will continue to kill themselves for being ashamed of who they are. This is why equality is important to me, because this isn't about a single issue. This is about lives, this is about ending teen bullying and suicide. This is about stopping the hate.  I look at the strides the LGBT community has made within this past decade and it astounds me. I look at heroes of our cause, like Harvey Milk, and I am awed and humbled. We have made great progress towards equality, but there is still more that must be done. As I said, we were born for this. We are at a crucible in time. We have been given the opportunity to stand for love, for justice, and for equality. We get to choose if we will be on the right side of history. Our issues are on the global stage. Will we choose to stand for hatred and bigotry, saying, some people aren't worthy of love and respect? Or will we choose to stand for a world without discrimination, saying, everyone has the right to be who they are and to love and live without fear?

    I support marriage equality, not because I wish to undermine its sanctity, but because we cannot say you are separate but equal. This has already been proven false. I wish, for the sake of those who oppose gay marriage, that the government would be completely removed from marriage. If this were the case then we wouldn't have to have this argument at all. If marriage were something completely reserved to the church, then we wouldn't be speaking out. However, the government is involved, so we must cry out for equality. When an atheist can be married and the church say nothing, even though they are still not doing something 'under God', but then that same church scream out against a homosexual couple trying to show commitment in the same way, something is wrong. When benefits are given to one group and kept out of reach of another, something is wrong. I stand for a world free of discrimination and free of hate. I stand for love, for justice. I am stating my support for this because I plan on taking a more active role in LGBT issues, specifically those concerning equality.

    To those who know me, to those who would feel betrayed by my support of this issue, I want to say that I haven't turned my back on you. I haven't forgotten what you have taught me and what I have learned from you. In fact, take solace in knowing that above all else, you have taught me to stand up for what I believe in, no matter the consequences or sacrifices. Take pride in knowing you have taught me to fight for justice. You have taught me to fight for what I believe to be right. I believe in this, I believe we, as a generation were meant for this. We were meant to decide how the next span of our culture will be. We were meant to decide if our children and their children will perpetuate a philosophy of hatred and bigotry or decide if that dogma stops with us. I, for one, choose to stand for love. We are strong, and we are not fearful, we will not be silent, because we are equal.

-Jacob Thomas, August 12th, 2012